Friday 26 November 2010

Italiano per favore.

Okay, so I had to write a post on my private university blog about me and one of my friends/ members of my family. But I had to do it in italian.
It's not like anyone can plagiarise it; it's info about me, so I decided to throw it up on here too. See if you can work out the stuff I'm talking about. :P

Buonasera tutti! Mi chiamo Ben e sono inglese. Abito Norwich, un citta di Norfolk. Norwich e simpatico citta, ma e a volte noioso. Ma io piace vivere qui. Ho venti anni e saro ventuno in due settimante. Io piace musica rock e mio preferito gruppo é Muse. Io suonare basso chitarra, ma io sono ancora apprendimento. Io non piace giocando sport, ma io piace guardare tennis, cricket, rugby e a volte calcio. Io lavoro come un commesso in un locale grande magazzino chiamato Roy's. Ho una ragazza, chiamato Gemma. Io non la vedo sua molto spesso; lei non vive a Norwich. Lei é una scuola elementare insegnante e lei é molto brava nel sua lavora. Lei ama il circo, molti generi di musica, la visione da film e la lettura.

Ciao e buonasera.

Tuesday 23 November 2010

Changes

"Something has changed within me. Something is not the same."

Yesterday I discovered somthing that made me feel like I was back in the middle of my old Open Uni course. You know the one I slacked off a bit too much? The one I failed miserably? The one that caused me unutterable stress, to the point I wanted to try self-harming, just to see if it helped? Yeah, you know the one. Anyway, I discovered that I have an assignment due on the 1st of December and I was totally unprepared. For a moment I felt a knot rip into my stomach and doubt pile into my mind. "No... I don't want to feel like this again... But I'm so sure now that I'll fail..."
I spent 4 hours at work and all I could think of was how I had an assignment due soon and how I was totally unprepared. I could feel mild panic setting in. But then something snapped, but in a good way; I'm pretty sure I felt my brows knot. "I. Will. Not. Fail." I said firmly to myself. "I refuse to fail these courses."
And I believe it.
I believe in myself.
Something has changed, or more accurately, someone has changed me. I was always one for giving up, quitting as soon as something didn't come very easily to me. But I feel that part of me has gone; replaced by courage and self-belief and self confience. And it's all down to one, solitary person. You know who you are.
I will pass these courses. I will. I know I will.

Sunday 21 November 2010

Life, love and randomness.

I am setting out with no purpose in writing this blog post. It could be long, it could be short, there's nothing that I have any specific reason to set out. I have no aim nor point to get across in this post. It will be purely rambling.

Today is Sunday the 21st of November 2010. I'm currently sitting in the back room of my grandparent's house awaiting the call through for dinner. Today has, so far, been a good day; I enjoyed church this morning. It was... a blessing to me. Sunday mornings used to be my least favourite part of my week but now they're my favourite part. As I get older, the Sunday morning service becomes more... important to me. More enjoyable. It becomes more and more like a place I actually want to be, not just a place I go because my mum takes me there. It sets up my week.
I'm currently listening to "As long as you're mine" from the Wicked musical soundtrack. It's on a mix CD that my girlfriend made for me. I don't think she realises how special the two cd's she made for me are. Music is the language that I understand. Sometimes I struggle with words, although I normally am fairly eloquent, and music speaks when I cannot. There's a quote by a French poet, Victor Hugo, that is one of my favourites; "Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent." It says exactly what I feel when it comes to music. Songs stir and move me and they don't even need to have lyrics. Pieces of instrumental music can have as much pertinence as a song with deep and moving lyrics. Music is the medium to express every emotion, every word that we lack the skill to express ourselves or lack the ability to express in everyday language.
I love my girlfriend. Bloody hell, I love her so much, sometimes I don't even know how to sufficiently express it in words. I adore her with every fibre of my being. She means the world and more to me. Altering something we say to each other sometimes; "La amo sua fino alla luna e ritorno". It means "I love her to the moon and back." That's about right; I love her to the most distant star in the most distant galaxy. She means everything to me. don't feel like it.
And, the thing is, that's how I want it to be. I've always said that I will grow old but I will never grow up. I won't sit down and I won't shut up, but most of all I will not grow up.
I'm looking forward to my birthday. I get to spend the 11th and the 12th with my girlfriend AND Minna. I was rather excited, to say the least, when my mum told me that Minna was coming over for my birthday. Then she said the Gemma could stay on the 11th for the 12th... Oh man, it will be beyond awesome. We're going out for a meal on the evening of the 11th, all 5 of us. Ugh, I just can't wait. I was so angry with my mum the last time Gemma stayed over; she was totally unwelcoming. Maybe this is my actually trying... Including Gem, trying to make her feel like part of the family. I really hope it is.
I've found myself in a very Doctor Who geek mode mood for quite a while now. I bought series 2 a week or so ago and Gem bought me series 1 for no apparent reason the other day and so I'm like DUN DUHDUN DUN DUHDUN DUN DUHDUN DUN DUN DUN all the time pretty much... I really want series 3, 4 and 5 now! We had a dress up day at work for Children in Need and I went as batman, however I was gonna go as the Doctor... But I couldn't get the neccessary kit together, besides the sonic screwdriver. I want to cosplay as 10 at some point. If I went to a convention of geekery, I would blatantly get a navy suit, maroon connies and some brainy specs. BAM, instant 10. Although that would mean shaving off the goatee... Hmmm, is it worth it? I'm unsure...

Anyway, I think I've rambled on enough now. Imma stop here.