The Checked Shirt and Pigeon-Holing

So you join me in this blogerino amidst a bit of a existential crisis of sorts and I am considering turning this blog post into a (most probably) short vlog later on, maybe tomorrow, so yeah, that could be interesting. Anyways, back to this existential crisis.

A couple of events occurred the other day that have led me to question myself; myself and, well, basically everything I am. One of these events has lead up to a purchase and the other will most likely lead up to another purchase... on Friday... if I can afford it.
The first event was this: I visit sainsburys and tried on a shirt. Today, I bought said checked shirt. *tragic screams accompanied by thunderclaps.* Yes,  I know... a checked shirt. The fare of hipsters and lumberjacks. It's a tragedy and I provide no excuse. The shirt looks good! And it's comfy. And I like it, okay. (As a side note, it's really nice; it's grey and red and looks really good on me. Moving on.)
Event numbero due! I visited the animal website and spotted something that I wouldn't normally say, "that's nice, I might get that." It was, in fact, an olive canvas messenger bag. Yes, I am most likely going to buy a man-bag on Friday. Possibly. If I can afford it which I probably can. ANYWAY.

Both these things are not normally "me" things; I'm pretty much the stereotypical nerdy type. T-shirts of Star Wars and TRON and space invaders and random things from Threadless... Standard, not really at all "fashionable" jeans, you know the drill. And in all honesty, I'm not really at all bothered by this. The shirt looks good. I like to carry stuff around with me and I only have 2 hands: solution - bag. At first I was a bit, like "what is happening to me!!1!1one!" But after thinking about it for a while (and, believe me, that's something I do a lot) I've come to the conclusion that nothing is happening to me at all. I'm just... buying stuff that I like/ is useful.

And then I got to thinking how we pigeon hole things. We take a certain type of clothing, a certain type of item, a certain interest and we pigeon hole it into a certain type or label or whatever you want to call it and although these pigeon holes tend to be pretty accurate I still can't help but wonder... what in the world is the point? See, my first reaction to getting a check shirt/ putting a bag on my wish list was to go "what's going on with me?" I've been taught, unintentionally, to assign these things to "hipsters" or those who are somewhat more "fashionable" than I. The first response I got when I told one of my friends that I bought a check shirt was "it's mantart-itis".
I don't like this. People are so often put off wearing things or doing things that they like because "it's emo" or "it's so hipster" and stuff like that which is ridiculous, from my point of view. Because I may start to wear checked shirts, doesn't mean I'll start listening to bands that you've never heard of because they're too obscure. Just because I may start to wear mostly black doesn't mean I slice my wrists and listen to My Chemical Romance and Bullet for my Valentine (I do like a bit of the MCR... Don't judge me.) and I find this whole ideology... really weird.
I doubt I'm making a whole lot of sense here but bear with me, I'll try and be clear.
I've noticed that we as humans have a need to classify and separate and to make distinct the things that we encounter in an effort to better understand them. But to better understand each other, that classification shouldn't be implemented. We're all humans; surely that should be enough without filing each other under E for Emo, G for Goth, H for Hipster, N for Nerd, W for Whatever...

Now, I'm going to confuse matters here by saying that I don't mind people assuming a certain - for the sake of simplicity I'll say - label. I would class myself as a big, fat, juicy nerd with a side helping of geek. I'm perfectly content and proud to be classified as such. But the difference is, I cannot for the life of me understand the need for anyone to see someone enjoying a certain thing which makes them then go "Oh, X-person's a *insert label*" Am I being crazy here because I feel like I am...

I guess it's the distinction between "I identify with this label" and "I don't know you, but you dress in a certain way so I will apply this label to you." It's that automatic assumption that we know something about a person at first glance when we really know nothing. Not their taste in music, not their favourite tv shows, not their political affiliations, not the beliefs. It's a waste of time, ninety-nine percent of the time, to pre-judge in this kinda fashion because the majority of the time the stereotypes are disproved. It would be so much more worth our time if we suspended our judgement and actually spent some time getting to know people before applying any label. I know that from experience, and it's so much more interesting that way.

Well, that's about all of today's illogical and potentially oxymoronic ramblings. Take care interwebs.

Books!

So lately I've been on this massive reading kick and it doesn't seem to be going away which is AWESOME!
I used to read a whole lot when I was younger - mainly a lot of Enid Blyton books, like the Famous Five and the Adventure Series and things like that. I used to love stories about normal, young kids going off and having amazing adventures where smugglers and robbers and all these bad guys would hatch their plans, only to have them foiled by kids my age. I felt like I could be any one of them, hatching plans to stop the bad guys getting away with it. But as I got older, and as I discovered the internet, my reading started to fade and there was a period of a few years where I didn't read at all. I think that it was partly to do with a drying up of reading material. I was getting too old for Blyton and I didn't like the look/ sound of anything else. Oh how things change...

I find myself eager to read more and more, and I love it! I guess I have John Green to thank partly for it. I was given Paper Towns (and some of his other books) and that was when I really came into my love for it all. I realised there are exciting, thrilling books about life as I would like to live it - whether that be as a different version of myself in this reality, or as an ultimate version of myself in multiple different realities.
I've read 24 books so far this year, which is ridiculous considering I barely read 5 last year, if that. I consume books, like I would a good meal. Especially books that feed my imagination; Assassin's Creed, Eragon, Inkheart, Doctor Who, Frankenstein, The Hobbit... all have been read in the last year.
It's funny really. A year ago I was all about the movies, the DVDs which I still love. But... pages. Words. The smell of a new book, or a good old one. My second-hand copy of Inkheart smells delicious. As does my brand-new copy of Eragon. It's like all the smells that are described in the book, all the smells that are smelled by the characters leak out and mix into this overriding smell that defines the story. And I half believe it... 

I don't know why Paper Towns triggered me so much and caused me to start reading again so furiously. But I'm very glad it did. I've been missing out on a lot of great books...

Kermode: How to Take Life Too Seriously

I have a great deal of love and respect for Dr Kermode. But he needs to give the Pirates franchise a rest.

Having just watched an enormous argument he had with Jason Isaacs about why the Johnny Depp is terrible in Pirates of the Caribbean (which I totally disagree with) I feel like I want to comment on this. Regardless of my feelings, I love a good Kermodian rant and the video was pretty hilarious (see here).

I'm not possessed of this "stupid gene" of which he speaks; I "got" Inception on my first viewing. (Because we all know how hard that movie is to get.) But I like Pirates 1,2 and 3 (4 not so much). I know it's big, it's stupid, it's ridiculous and you know what? I love it. I love it for the simple reason that sometimes, when I go to the cinema, I want to be entertained. Shock horror, yeah!? The Devil's Double was shocking and hard to watch, but I can appreciate it as a shocking move. It's a movie that you wouldn't expect to be made. But when I go to the cinema I don't go for a lecture or for an artistic piece or for some piece of cinema that is avante garde. I go to watch something that entertains me. Pirates of the Caribbean may be a bit rubbish, but I love it because it is entertaining. It does what is says on the tin; they are pirates and they are in the Caribbean. You shouldn't expect much more from a movie with that title. 

Don't get me wrong though; On Stranger Tides was rubbish and they should have left it at a trilogy.

Review: Eragon

Eragon by Christopher Paolini

My rating: 4 of 5 stars



well, firstly I can understand why Eragon gets such a rough deal when it comes to reviews. It is very unoriginal; I warn any potential readers that you will find Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and a plethora of other fantasy novels/ series in here. However, that didn't bother me in the slightest. I found the book well written, I found it exciting, I found it engaging. Although the scenery was a but done, the characters were new if a little cliched (the farm boy, the old man that turns out to be a wizard and teaches the farm boy but then dies too early, the gruff, unexpected hero with a dark secret...) All that set aside, I cannot lie. I really very enjoyed this book and even gave me shivers at certain places.

Now, a word on unoriginality. There are three types of unoriginal: distractingly unoriginal, cherry picking and fan-fiction. Eragon falls into the second category. As I read it I didn't find myself going, "oop, there's some LotR... And there's some Potter..." etc and so on. It was only when I looked a bit more closely that I noticed the parts that were cherry picked from other great books. Now I have no issue with this. It makes a great story with it's own, individual characters. It was like building a lego set with pieces of other lego sets and placing your own, made up mini-figures inside it. I enjoyed the journey and I really look forward to reading Eldest (when I get done with Inkspell.)



View all my reviews

The Man Who Calmed the Sea

See the stricken boat
As it is tossed upon the sea
Hear the fearful cries
That wake the man from Galilee
He stands before the raging
Speaks peace and harmony
Winds and waves obey
He is the man who calmed the sea

Hear among the crowds
A desperate father's anguished plea
"Heal my dying child"
He begs the man from Galilee
With words that banish sorrow
"Don't fear, but just believe
Daughter - live again!"
Commands the man who calmed the sea

And as she stands before them
What joy from agony
He's the Master and the Maker
He's the man who calmed the sea

Feel the bitter pall
That shrouds the hill of Calvary
High upon the cross
There hangs the man from Galilee
The earth it quakes with sorrow
The sky grows dark with grief
All creation mourns
To lose the man who calmed the sea

But, no, death could not hold Him
The stone is rolled away
For He's the Master and the Maker
He's the man who calmed the sea

Now I hear the call
That echoes down through history
“Come, deny yourself
Take up your cross and follow Me
Through every joy and sorrow
My grace is all you’ll need
Trust me in the storm
For I’m the man who calms the sea.”

No fear shall overwhelm me
For Lord, I do believe
You're the Master and the Maker
You're the man who calms the sea

I’ll trust You for tomorrow
And seek You for today
For You're the Master and the Maker
You're the man who calms the sea

*

I don't know if anyone reads this blog. I don't know if anyone that reads this blog is a Christian. But I don't really care about that right now because I need to express this.
There are moments in my life when I sit back and think about how amazing God is and how enormous his love for me is. It's usually just after reading something in the bible or listening to a song that I get this realisation; it's like a little of the cloudiness of human consciousness gets displaced and I see a little more of God's glory than I normally do. And it overwhelms me. I get so full of awe at how massive God is and how immense the gift of his son was that I can't control it and I just have to let myself be awestruck. It happened when I was listening to this song earlier on, at the parts I've boldified. I can't understand why I was chosen to benefit from this great plan, because I'm pretty worthless. I'm this tiny insignificant human that is so weak and fails at living for God so frequently. So why should I be the one to benefit from God's greatness, from Jesus's sacrifice? I literally cannot grasp it; I am so totally undeserving of what Jesus Christ did for me. But that doesn't erase the fact that he did it for me, personally. It's just so amazing that there is nothing in me that is adequate in praise, in love, in worship or anything.
I cannot express the enormity of what I am feeling right now. Just... the utter astonishment; greater love than I know how to deal with; such deep gratitude to Him.
I am totally overwhelmed tonight. My tiny human head can't handle all this greatness.

ReadIt1st - Hank Green's Poor Idea

So Hank Green - someone whom I admire a great deal - came up with an idea in a recent video that, from the outset, I felt somewhat unsure about and now, having watched a few reaction videos, I know why. From Hank's screen shots that have been posted on Tumblr it looks as if Nerdfighters will sign a pledge to read the book before watching the movie. See, I would generally agree that the book is better than the movie and I would prefer to read the source material before I see the movie. That's my general preference, yes, and so from that point of view alone you would think I agree with the idea of the site, yes?

Well... not entirely.

You see, I feel there's a silent feeling in nerdfighteria that no one really talks about but a lot of us feel and that a feeling of "I'm not a real nerdfighter unless I've ~done/read/see/enjoyed X thing~". No one is any less of a nerdfighter than anyone else if they haven't, say, read Harry Potter. I've never read Harry Potter but I enjoyed the movies. That doesn't make me less of a nerdfighter than any Potterhead who can recite passages and knows about what the different wand cores actually mean and... all that jazz. But, see, this is the bad part about ReadIt1st; it elevates one point of view and implies it to be superior to all others. I know that Hank isn't saying that anyone that doesn't enjoy a book over a movie/ anyone that reads the book after the movie is wrong or should sort their act out and get in line or anything like that, of course he isn't.
But Nerdfighteria is the community in which every point of view is to be valued and respected (which is a bit of a pipe dream) and Hank creating this website which places one opinion above all others is a very un-nerdfighterish thing to do. I feel that Hank has, for a brief moment, forgotten to be awesome.

Review: Assassin's Creed: Book 3

Assassin's Creed: Book 3 by Oliver Bowden

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Here we go then. This was, as I thought from the start, a preface, shall we say, to the new game and book coming out in November: Assassins Creed Revelations. It reads as the recounting of Altair's story by Niccolo Polo told to Maffeo Polo, his brother. It goes from Altair's experiences as a young child born into the order, his missions against the Templars (and the betrayal he faces in the wake of this), his return to the Order and his ascent as the Assassin Master. It also brings to light how the Piece of Eden, The Apple, was brought to the knowledge of the Assassins, how Altair learned its secrets and wrote the Assassin Codex, how the Codex was lost and how the Creed was brought to the east.



Another Assassin's Creed book knocked back and I am left feel at once satisfied and hungry for more. This books was a brilliant insight into the life of the greatest of Master Assassins. Released as a bit of a pre-buffer to Revelations, hinting at items called "keys" that, I can only assume, with feature as the main quest driver for the new game. The body of the book is, as I said, Niccolo Polo recording telling Altair's story to his brother Maffeo in his journals. In the prologue and the epilogue the reader is shown that these journals are being read by a Master assassin, <spoiler>later reveled to be Ezio Auditore whom is on his way to Constantinople in search of these scattered and hidden "keys", whatever they may be for.</spoiler>



It was exciting; each chapter left me wanting to turn to the next and learn more. Altair's story was woven so well, throwing up new twists when you felt sure that the bulk of his story was drawing to a close. As the final climax of the story built up I could not put it down: I had to finish it.

And not only was the storytelling engrossing, but the quality was much improved on Bowden's previous work. As always, some klunky writing was present, however the story felt like a whole. It felt like it had a solid beginning, a solid middle and a solid end, whereas Renaissance and Brotherhood did feel kind of like the end was rushed and tacked on as an after-thought. Not with Crusade; it was solid, steady, exciting, engrossing and satisfying while teasing you with enough information and tips about what might come, enticing you as to what the next instalment of AC might bring. I can't wait for Revelations now.



Very good read, if you're willing to overlook some slightly less-polished moments.



View all my reviews

Summer in the City

Nope, this isn't going to be a about Summer in the City; the huge youtube gathering that goes on in London. As much as I would like it to be...
Today, I spent about 6 hours in Norwich, which was really nice. I really like going into the city when I have no particular reason to because I can just roam and explore. Best thing about summer in Norwich? The buskers. Some of them are... well, I'll be honest, they're pretty rubbish to be honest. There was this one guy that was obviously homeless, poor bloke, and he had a tin whistle. Problem is... he could only play one tune, and then not that well. But we do seem to have a good crop of street performers. There's a guy who plays the mandolin outside Waterstone's, the guy that was playing the Hurdy Gurdy sometimes we get Swervy World (who are always good). Today I happened across a young lady, name of Jade playing down London Street. I heard her as I was walking up that way and really liked her sound (I have a real soft spot for female vocalists; if they're good, I can't help but listen). So, I propped up the front of Costa for a bit and had a listen, which was fine. But one of the thing's I found was... I couldn't stop listening. I just wanted to listen to her all afternoon. Before too long she popped down her Uke and waved me over. After thanking me from my patience and attention she produced a CD from her bag (which I can safely say, is really great).
A quick chat was had and, before long, I was residing on the bench nodding along to a few originals and some King Blues, Nirvana and Cranberries covers, done Ukulele stylee! Absolutely fantastic way to spend an afternoon; great music, fun company. :)
If anyone read this (and that's pretty unlikely) I would totally recommend you get to youtube and check out Myself Me Ukulele.

***

Today was a really great day; bright, warm, chilled out. I managed to get a little caching in, although I went for a couple that I couldn't find. Either there seemed to be nowhere for it to hide (i.e. the St Peter Mancroft church) or there were too many muggles, and seemingly drunk ones at that (i.e. Haunted Norwich - Maddermarket). However I managed to find Peace Pole and Isengard... which, technically, Gemma and I placed it but it had to be moved and I didn't actually know where it was). I was very pleased with how well we hid it; it's very clever. :P
I missed Gem today, it was weird, I was just sat in Mc Donald's eating lunch and I was just thinking "hmm. This is a really nice day. I'd like to hang out with someone. Gem would like today. I miss Gem. Hmmm". I could have done with her cache finding skills... :P

Overall; today was great. Great weather, great city, great music, great company, and I read a great book for about an hour in Chapelfield Gardens (AC: Renaissance).

Oh, and I found John Green's books in Waterstones. Yes, I left a note in one of them. It was cool.

Review: The Hunger Games

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


I had no expectations of this book, didn't really know what it was about and the only reasons I read were simply that 1) my sister had it and 2) it seemed like a series of books that you had to love if you're a part of the Nerdfighter community. So naturally I felt that I'd give it a go.

From the start I was drawn into the story. Although Collins's first person present style is a little clunky in places, I found it to also be a very dynamic and immersive style of storytelling. From the start I wanted to know about these people, and before long it felt like I did know them. The main characters are established well and I feel myself liking whom I should like, disliking whom I should dislike and feeling indifferent to whom it was deserved. It did what it said it should.
As the Games got underway, I was drawn into them and could not bear to put the book down, not wishing to leave the characters hanging. Unwilling to leave them to the horrors of the Games I had to carry on as long as I could.

Looking back, I was absorbed and in this area the book did very well. I could hardly put it down. In the name of impartiality, I did find her writing style very awkward at times. I was occasionally distracted by the way her sentences seemed to tangle themselves up a bit, however that was partly her composition and partly her choice to use the first person present tense...

I immensely enjoyed and subsequently moved straight on to Catching Fire.



View all my reviews

The Labyrinth

Last night I finished reading Looking for Alaska.
I totally loved it; it was hilarious and heart-breaking and thought provoking... A review will probably appear after I give it a shot on GoodReads and link it back here, but one question was raised in the book that has got me thinking. So, I'm about to get all philosophical on y'all.

"How will I ever get out of this labyrinth of suffering?"

This all depends on your perspective, first off. The way we see life is not a compulsory point of view, but a choice; i.e. whether you focus on the good or the bad is up to you as an individual. Suffering is not the be all and end all of life. As a Christian, I personally believe that difficulties and things that could be described as suffering is not negative. It often turns out to have been a good thing and something positive, although no one thinks that way when it's happening.
But there is something I want to comment on regarding the nature of labyrinths. Mazes and labyrinths are not the same thing and I will explain this. Mazes have a complex system of paths and branching paths, false or otherwise. A labyrinth however has only one path that winds and twists around on itself. A maze must be figured out; you can go down false paths which lead to dead ends or take you back on yourself. You can get lost, search for a long time and still not have an idea where you're going or if you'll ever find your way out. The solution to a labyrinth is to simply keep walking. Keep following that path that winds on and on until eventually you reach the exit.

And so, simply, there you have it. How will you ever get out of the labyrinth of suffering? By putting one foot in front of the other, so to speak. You just keep going, pushing past the obstacles and ignoring distraction because one day, eventually, when you're not expecting to, you'll run straight out of the exit.
And that's the simple truth of it.

Cacher

I have recently come to a stark and serious realisation and that is that a) I have gained weight and b) I need to lose some of said weight. I've noticed that the positive habit I formed of refraining from eating too much sweet stuff and eating between meals had slipped recently and through this my girth has swelled somewhat. I've decided that this will not do; I do not want to be an overweight blob of grease again. The excess eating and stuff is being cracked down on, that's not so hard to do; making sure I think twice before having that twix. Deciding to have a drink before I eat, because that (surprisingly) does help to curb hunger. Stuff like that is reasonably easy to do. But there is a whole other arena that needs to be tackled; physical movement. Now, as are most internet people, I am reluctant to... well, move. We like the intertubes; we like to sit on our butts, watch youtube videos and blog. (And when I say blog, I mean reblog photos and junk on tumblr.)
I needed to actually move because cutting out junk food and all that jazz isn't enough. So, I have turned to the magical world of geocaching and I love it! I've become a total addict. I want to constantly find caches and place caches. It's a great thing to do for me because it's active; not only physically but mentally. Most of the time you're given the coordinates and a cryptic clue including some specifics, which means you have to work out the clue and then, when you get there, work out where the cache might be. Because it's not as simple as looking on the ground for a box or something. They're hidden, and a lot of the time they're hidden REALLY well. I spent 20 odd minutes searching for my first cache. It took me a while, but it was worth it because the excitement you feel after finally finding this little thing is crazy; there's this huge sense of accomplishment. Like you've actually found treasure, but in reality it's just trinkets. Poker chips and guitar picks and tiny animals and the occasional trackable (they're fun: you log them online and you can see where it's been). I need mental stimulation otherwise I just... stagnate so caching is perfect for me.
Now, you don't always have a successful time, as was evidenced today. My phone decided to scramble the gps signal and lead me in the complete opposite to the direction the cache was in. I ended up 1.6km away. But this turned out for the best because it lead to me spotting some nice places to drop caches. Here's where physical exercise comes in; I went out on my bike (which I never do) and after my failure to find even the right area I thought that it was pointless to just go straight home. So I went for a tour of the back roads of Costessey, just buzzing about here there and whatever road I felt like going down. I saw places I knew and places I didn't, but it all added up to one thing; I enjoyed being active and that's the main thing. I got back home and I felt tired, but good tired; satisfied that I'd managed to go out for a bike ride and managed to do more than a full pelt circuit of the block.

I know that this is only a small victory on the way to getting my weight down to where I was, but I feel proud of myself. I feel like I've accomplished something. I am man! Raaaar!

Review: Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood

Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood by Oliver Bowden

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


I'm always slightly dubious whenever I start a video game book adaptation. they're rarely anything special and they're often very forgettable reads. So I was pleasantly surprised with how much I enjoyed reading Brotherhood.



From the beginning, Bowden's style felt a little flat and a little unimaginative, add to that his sometimes clumsy structure. There were the occasional random changes in POV which just seemed awkward.

As I read through the first few chapters I felt like I was simply reading through a log of someone playing the game. "I did this challenge/ quest, then there's a cut scene *insert subtitled dialogue copied off screen*, then I did this next quest..." you get the picture. That threw me a little and I was a bit let down. However, after a few chapters it felt like Bowden had found his stride and warmed to the idea. It became less of a log of the experience and more of a novelization of the game although the clumsiness didn't disappear. As I read on I found myself becoming engaged in the story, despite knowing essentially what happened already - I haven't played the game, although I have watched a play-through of it. The story of Ezio Auditore's fight to eradicate the evil Borgia family's influence over Italy moved along in an exciting and interesting way, adding a little flesh to the bones of the Brotherhood game. You get to see a little added material through this book - some of the bits and pieces that link the individual "memories" of the game. An enjoyable experience for the majority of the book.

But, as I got closer to the end of the book it started to feel like Bowden was rushing, almost like he'd totally lost interest in the project. As I reached the last part of the book (it's divided into three parts) I was finding pointlessly short chapters; for example, chapter 59 is one paragraph long and a paragraph that could have easily been added to the previous chapter. This almost lazy and pointless extending of the chapter number did annoy me a little as it just seemed unnecessary.

But I can say that these things didn't hamper my enjoyment of the story and the book as a whole.



I was pleasantly surprised by Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood. It's not amazingly written, but it's rather enjoyable. It's very much a nerdy gamer's book so if you've never played the games or don't really have that much of an interest in them then I would stay away from this one, if I were you...



View all my reviews

Review: An Abundance of Katherines

An Abundance of Katherines by John Green

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


Before I start, I want to state that I'm writing this as a fan of John Green. As much as I will try to stay impartial, I read this book as a John Green book; not as a book which I picked up because I thought it looked interesting.

Okay, so where to start... Abundance is about Colin Singleton: once a child prodigy, he is now reaching a sort of mid-life crisis, where he's no longer a prodigy but can't see himself becoming a "genius". He has also lately gone through a big break up with his nineteenth girlfriend, one of many girls that are all very different but all share one thing; their name. Yes, Colin's type is girls named Katherine. He's feeling the effects of this breakup particularly deeply, so he and his (slightly overweight) best friend, Hassan, go on a road trip of discovery, as it were. They find themselves in the out-of-the-way town of Gutshot where they meet the pretty but not overwhelmingly beautiful Linsey Lee Wells and somehow find themselves in the employ of her large, muumuu bedecked mother Hollis. As Colin and Hassan perform their job of interviewing all the older generation in Gutshot, they slowly discover more about each other, and about themselves.

Okay, so there are some issues I have with this book. After reading the excellent Paper Towns I was slightly let down. I found the character of Colin overly whiney and annoying and as I read I didn't feel much sympathy for him at all. I warmed more to the ever so slightly douchey Hassan, but with time I found them both reasonably annoying. Reading the book, I got annoyed by the overuse of the terms fug/fugging/fugger (if you have to swear, you might as well just do it), jew-fro and kafir (arabic for infidel, as was so helpfully explained by the footnotes). The biggest problem with this was, as I said, lack of sympathy for Colin. I jut found his whining about how much he loved Katherin XIX pathetic and I just wanted him to buck up and find some balls.

However, it wasn't all bad. One thing that I found quite interesting about the book was the use of footnotes to explain points, give added depth to references and so on. When I flicked through the book I thought of them as a negative thing and something that could hinder the story telling, but I actually found them quite helpful and entertaining which was a pleasant surprise. As the book progressed, I found myself wondering whether or not Colin and Lindsey would get together (which of course they did), but it was good to be kept guessing as I read on. As I neared the end of the book, Colin underwent a bit of a change from whiner to shiner. Cue heroic punch up in which he (and Hassan) got thrashed, but it was in defence of the lovely Lindsey. This scene actually provided an excellent description of what happens when you get extremely forcefully knee'd in the groin; I was squirming in sympathy.

There was a certain point in the book, and I can't quite point my finger on when, when I felt myself not being overwhelmed by annoyance about Colin (and no it wasn't the end). But as I neared the end of the book I felt more and more warmly towards Colin, which is almost a miracle.

Looking back over the book I get the distinct feeling that I was supposed to find Colin extremely annoying. If I didn't then the change would be unimportant. Anyway, final verdict.

After the brilliant Paper Towns this is a little bit of a letdown. It didn't hook me in the same way and I didn't feel compelled to read chapter after chapter until I got nearer the end of the book. But nonetheless, I did enjoy it; I just know that I could have enjoyed it more.

Not bad, John. Not bad. Bring on Looking for Alaska


View all my reviews

Opposite Day

Just so we get this straight, I'm not talking about the weird, childhood contrivance that you would always use to get out of any situation...

"But you said you'd give me some Haribo!"

"Yeah, but it's opposite day!"

"You told me that you let me keep it!"

"Yeah, but it's opposite day!"

No, I had a really weird moment of revelation last night when I was sitting in the conservatory thinking about... stuff. I'm going to apply for a job. A job as a teaching assistant, and I'm trying not to get too excited about it. I may not get it, which will be slightly disappointing but hey, God's got his plan for me. Anyway, I spoke to mum about it and she said something which got me into this thinking state. She has, for a long time, said that I should work with Children. Now, for a long time my experience of kids was of small people that climb all over me, smother me, hid, squash me and are generally not fun people to be around. But I've totally gone through a change lately as is evidenced by the fact that I'm studying for a degree in Child Development and I'm planning on working with kids in some capacity. This comes after a very long time of being of the mindset that working with kids was not my thing; it just didn't interest me and I was going to work with animals or the environment or something like that. And it got me thinking, what else have I been telling myself that I don't like and yet slowly and over time, I've come to subconsciously reverse how I feel.

One of the biggest thing that I came to realise as I thought over stuff was this; I always thought that I was a country person. Loved being in the country, I loved the alone-ness and the peace and quiet and all that jazz and the city was not to my liking. Too many people, too many buildings, grey and stuff. Don't laike.

My favourite place is London. This is weird thinking about it. I love the city, especially bigger cities. I love how you can get lost in the crowds of people and become as singular as if you were in the middle of nowhere. The concrete jungle, as it is clichedly called, is pretty acurate; you can get lost, you can find new little places, you can hide away and you can find sudden green, beautiful refuges in the middle of the grey expanse. I have randomly switched from a country mouse to a town mouse and it scares me a little how easy and... subconscious it was.

Ah well, change is good, eh? I'm not afraid of it; if it leads you to where you need to be then I'm all for it. You tend to be better off and happier when than before the change and it's going to happen whether or not you fight against it so you might as well let it happen. Anyway, this is staring to get philosophical and I am too hungry for that! I also have no headphones to listen to philosophicaly inducing musics... not yet anyway (woo for buying £135 earphones for £4.99. I rule.)

I also cannot wait for the influx of packages that are gonna arrive; I've got Will Grayson, Will Grayson coming from Gem which I'm SO excited about, I've got a couple of posters, I've got a couple of DVDs, I've got the Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood book... It will be interesting if it all comes at once. Just this massive pile of stuff through my door. I actually kinda want it to all come at once... I can pretend I have fan-mail. Psh, yeah right, as if I'd have fans. :P I'd need to be, like, cool for that...

ANYWAY, I will not see you and you will not see me unless I know you in real life and if you are WHAT ARE YOU DOING READING MY BLOG!? This is private; only me and the rest of the internet are allowed to see. And a few of my irl friend. Well, one.

Anyway, TTYL and K.B.O.

That awesome moment when...

A hymn is given out at church and the first page you turn to is the right one.

How good? So good.

Nostalgia Doth Conquer

I've been having random bouts of nostalgia lately and they've been occurring in increasing frequency... I mean, it's not a bad thing. It just confuses me as to why it's happening so much lately. Could I be getting older and, dare I say... growing *gag* up?
Pffffffffffffffft, nah, not me. But it's still pretty interesting to see what actually triggers it. The other day I was sat in the garden reading and listening to music, when I saw some Swifts wheeling about over head. Now, this got me all excited because Swifts have, for a long time, been my favourite birds. I'm a huge fan of birds of prey and they're the type of bird that I prefer to deal with, look at and just generally be involved with, however Swifts will always be my favourite. They are, for me, incredibly nostalgic because I have always, for as long as I can remember, associated them with summer, the start of summer. And so at that moment, when I heard them for the first time in 2011, I took out my earphones, closed my eyes as I lay on the grass, and took in their crazy screaming. It's something I look forward to each year; haring that scream and seeing those distinctive anchor shapes blasting about above my head. As I write this I can hear some now... goosebumps, I tell thee. It's really that evocative.
It's little things like that that I love and have particular fondness for. Small things are what I love for, not enormous fanfares. That's just ostentatious to me; cobwebs with dew on them, bumblebees on a plant that smells good, unexpected kisses on the cheek, radiator pants... It's all small and it's all awesome!

I was thinking about this whole attachment thing the other day and I was wondering if everyone else is as reliant upon links and connections as I am. Whilst there are almost definitely people that are more reliant than me, and others that are less reliant, I think that to a certain extent everyone applies nostalgic connections to events and situations in life. I think it's just another one of those little things that makes us human.

Ciao and K.B.O.

DFTBA

That awkward moment when I'm watching the live stream of a guy in America I've never met opening tons of cards and packages from people that neither I nor he has ever met and realising that I'm part of such a massive thing (know as Nerdfighteria) that has helped me become a bigger and better person.

I know what you're thinking; how can two guys that make videos on youtube have that much of an effect on my life? I don't know them personally, I've never met them. But I don't need to. Hank and John Green are two very different yet completely awesome brothers. And through the movement they've begun, a.k.a Nerdfighters and Nerdfighting, I've found a place and a description.
The impact that they've had on my life has been unnoticed yet the more I think about it, the more profound I realise it's been. I can't imagine not being involved in the nerfighter community in some way... Learning to accept who I am, not being ashamed of that and embracing those things that I love and can and are often described as "sad, stupid, weird" and all come under the heading of "nerdery". I'm me for many different reasons; the biggest influence is my faith, the second biggest influence is nerdfighteria.

I can't even put this into words sufficiently, it's so annoying. Hank and John Green are so incredibly important to me and, even though that sounds cheesy and a liiittle creepy, it's true. Every time I see a video that is associated with them or nerdfighteria I remember that I am me and I am awesome. I can make a difference through my own efforts and I can reduce the suckyness in this world. It constantly encourages me to try and improve the things and people around me by first improving myself. It inspires me to be better than I have been in the past but not to wish the past away; work off it, improve on it and never EVER forget to be awesome.

So yeah, happy Hanko de Mayo, and by no means should you F.T.B.A.

Epyon

Master grade Gundam Epyon. I am currently loving Ban Dai! They finally gave us master grade shenlong (which I still NEEEED) and now Epyon! I mean, look at how gorgeous it is:


I want it. So very much. I'm loving the slightly altered design for the Endless Waltz re-designs they're doing lately; I love how angular it is. The only thing I'm slightly worried about is the transformation; I wonder how flimsy that'll make the frame. Knowing Ban Dai, they'll probably do a good job of the kit, especially with the success they've been having with this run of Wing kits. They've been tight, trim and slim; the inner frames work exceptionally well and everything's just right where it should be and works just as it should. I'm just wondering how much of the XXXG inner frame is going to remain in this kit or whether they'll just design a totally new one. It's gonna be pretty complex getting it to transform in the way it does so I'm thinking they may start of with the XXXG frame as a base and crate a new version... Anyway, we'll just have to wait and see. I'm really looking forward to this release; it's been a long time coming and, after the Wing Gundam, it's my favourite mobile suit from Gundam Wing. And, from the looks of it, it's going to be a good 'un.

TTYL, K.B.O.

The Glorious Tale of Eggy Rite part 1

By Ben and Emily; born from that madness that only late nights can bring.

Come near, dear children, and I will tell you tale of the most magnificent superhero that ever did live. He has a heart of gold, an honourable spirit and the most glorious mane of hair you ever did see. Listen closely as I tell you the story of his mild mannered, every-day persona, Edgar Wright, and the dreadful events that cause him to take up the cloak of EGGY RITE once again...

***

There exists a website dedicated to the praise and love of Edgar Wright.

He looks at it every day to remind himself that people love him because otherwise he would just wander around his house, flushing cake in every one of his 17 bathrooms as he cries into his bathroom rug which is in the shape of Scott Pilgrim's face. He then goes into his private cinema and watches his movies on a loop and phones his famous friends and tells them how great his movies were.

whilst brushing his luscious mane and eating smarties. But only the blue ones. He has people to separate them. He savours them in the gap between his two front teeth before drinking mountain dew in copious amounts.

"Oh god" he sighs. "So alone!"

"You're not alone," says Nick Frost.

"You're just being melodramatic," says Simon Pegg.

A wide grin creeps over his face as Nick produces a large cake.

"um, I was given this by my friend the other day. It's really moist..."

Edgar's eyes widen and an idea forms.

"Nick," Simon says. "It's happening again... look at his face..."

Nick looks at his face. "It's... so beautiful..." mumbles nick.

Edgar is so shocked by his friend's comment that he gasps.

Nick shakes his head and looks sheepish before expplaining "um... I meant... the cake. The cake is so beautiful. We need to give it a proper send off because I can't eat it all myself."

"Oh....right" Edgar's face turns to disappointment. Was Nick denying it, or was he really referring to the cake? Well, he does like cake a lot.

Simon, feeling awkward about all this, suddenly piped up. "Eggy, where is the nearest toilet nearest the nearest kitchen? We need a knife and a porcelain grave for this sweet delicacy."

"Finally" Edgar thinks. Cake flushing had always been a hobby that the trio cherished. He loved his two best friends so much and these were surely the happiest moments of his life.

"Oh you needn't worry about getting a knife..." and with a flourish, Egar produced a long, silver cake knife from his sleeve. "I am always prepared for a situation such as this"

Simon and Nick stand in shock. That was a little odd. But they overlooked it, and walked upstairs to the bathroom.

As the three of them stood round the empty porcelain abyss, awaiting to take the poor sponge's soul to cakey heaven as it was sacrificed to the gods of confectionary, Simon looked to Nick who was solemnly holding the cake, steady and reverently. "Nick, would you like to say a few words...?"

Nick held back his tears. It always hurt a little to see some cakey goodness that was not entering his stomach. "I....sorry."

Simon could see that his friend was having difficulty.

"It's okay, Nick. It's ok..." Edgar comforted, laying a hand on Nick's shoulder. "Farewell, sweet cakey goodness," he murmured, turning to regard the glossy brown expanse of the cake's surface.

Flush.

And it was done.

The three amigos stood in silence for a moment until it was broken by Simon's incredulous cry.

"How can a toilet stand such cake!?"

They laughed their little hearts out. Edgar felt good.

Edgar turned and wrapped his two best friends in a warm hug. "You guys... I love you guys... SO. MUCH." He tightened the hug, thumping Nick and Simon on the back.

Nick and Simon shared a look of concern. Sure, they liked each other, but Edgar had never been so passionate like this. Was something wrong? Was he dying?

"Edgar..." Nick said slowly... "Is everything alright? You're not, I dunno, dying or something are you?" Because that would really suck."

Edgar blinked. "Really?" He thought. He couldn't just show how much he cared for him without it meaning that he was dying?

He shuffled uncomfortably, not really knowing what to say. Eventually, he decided to tell them the truth.

"You two... are my only friends. There, I said it. You guys are my only cake flushing amigos and... without you I'd probably commit suicide..." he cast his eyes to the ground and added. "Or actually eat all the cake and become really fat..."

Simon and Nick felt a rush of despair. "But Edgar, we thought you had loads of friends! The only reason we made Paul without you is because we thought you had Quentin Tarantino for company. How is he by the way?"

"I hate Quentin, that gossipy bitch. All he does is sit around and talk about Rose McGowan and how great he is and how awesome his movies are and how highly polished his ginormous chin is. Psh."

Woah. Simon and Nick hadn't had the faintest idea. Now they felt really guilty for their poor friend Edgar. "He could've been a part of Paul and not have to make that crappy Scott Pilgrim film!" Simon and Nick collectively thought.

Edgar's head drooped slightly as his expression of affection was met with silence. "It's ok guys..." Edgar mumbled. "I'm sorry for this awkwardness. I'll go back to my cinema and watch Hot Fuzz for the seventy-second time... You know it's really a very underrated film..." his voice trailed off as a single tear rolled down his cheek.

In that single tear Simon and Nick saw themselves. They saw what they had become. Monsters. Heartless betraying bastards.

They looked at each other and in that glance they silently communicated with each other. Simon grinned and turned back to look at the forlorn countenance of the bemourned Edgar Wright.

"Don't worry Eggy; we'll come too. I haven't seen Hot Fuzz for a while and, from what I can remember, I'm quite the bad ass in it.

"That you were, Peggster. That you were..." Edgar said as he lead the two of them into his secret basement cinema.

It was dark.

What could happen in that darkness, no one knew. But none of them expected what did happen...

The three cake-flushing amigos sat together in a prime spot, Nick still clinging to the remainder of the cake; a small chunk to flush later. As the three of them sat there, eating sweet popcorn, there came all of a sudden a great crashing sound as a massive hole was torn in the ceiling of the cinema.

It was none other than Edgar's arch enemey; Quentin Tarrantino.

"YOU FUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS I HATE YO- oh hey Edgar what's up best bud? Did you know that I am awesome and I have a chin and everyone worships me in the film world. You're nothing Edgar. But I still like you."

Edgar's head dropped. Quentin's comments hurt, as always.

Simon was not content to let this continue. He turned to Nick and said "Quick. you know what we have to do."

"No... do you... is that wise?" Nick asked with some trepidation.

"DAMMIT MAN, JUST GET THE CREME EGG!"

With speed surprising for a man of his stature, Nick set off into the kitchen, on the hunt for one of the rare treats, for that was whas was needed to transform humble and mild-mannered Edgar wright into *insert fanfare EGGY RITE.

SUPERHERO TO THE NERDS.

Whilst Nick sprinted upstairs to the kitchen, Edgar sat cowering in his cinema next to Quentin.

Simon watched on. He could see the hurt in Edgar's eyes as he listened to how bad a director he was and how terrible A Fistful of Fingers was. Nick would be back soon though. And then Edgar would transform once more, for the first time in years.

Meanwhile, Nick made a mess of the kitchen. He searched every drawer, but to no avail. There were only smarties "Edgar and his damn smarties!" Nick shouted, stressed by Simon's pressuring words.

"SIMONTHEREARENOEGGSWHEREARETHEY!" Nick called out, frantically throwing drawers all over the floor. Then he saw them; shining out from behind the back of a draw he had just yanked out, there rested the stash of ultimate creme eggs that Edgar had hidden for just such an occasion. With an exuberant fist pump he grabbed one of the treasured orbs of power and ran back to the cinema.

"TO EDGAR!" yelled Nick.

....

"THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION!"

Nick kicked opened the door to the cinema. Edgar was now in tears, but Quentin showed no signs of stopping.

"Did you get one?!" cried Simon frantically

"One?" Nick asked as he wiped sweat from his forehead, "I got 20"

"Excellent!" Cried Simon and he quickly snatched one from Nick's clutches. Unwrapping it at high speed he darted over to Edgar, lifted his head and thrust the egg into his gaping mouth before moving his jaw and forcing him to chew. It had been years since Edgar had undergone this transdormation, was he still capable of it...?

"AGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Edgar, as he started ripping off his clothes The intense feeling of chocolate erupting from his skin was causing him so much pain, but all Simon and Nick could do was watch as their friend suffered. Edgar fell to the floor. He looked at his legs. "SO GOOEY!" he thought. This always happened in his transformation, he was tempted. He was tempted to take a bite out of himself, one of the many troubles of being Eggy Rite.

TBC...